The Era of Sarah with Sarah Rachel Lazarus

Wish I Could Be A Comedy Queen (W/ Alaska )

• Sarah Rachel Lazarus / Alaska • Season 1 • Episode 22

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Hieee! This week, I dish about $3000 Dachsunds, News Headline's in the early 2000's,  Katharine McPhee's republicanism and much more. I am joined by the hilarious and ICONIC, Alaska Thunderf*ck.   She's a drag queen, recording artist, and comedian know for winning Ru Paul's Drag Race Season 2, Releasing three chart-topping studio albums,  and cohosting the Race Chaser podcast with Willam . Check out her new comedy special "The Alaska Thunderf**k Extra Special Comedy Special’  on OUTtv’s USA Apple TV Channel.

We dished about her time on Drag Race, Rolaskatox Covid Vaccine's, Madlibs to Read U Wrote U,' the process of creating her new comedy special and much more.

Watch video content from this episode on youtube @ Sarah R Lazarus Comedy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmSFYBIZfGQ&list=PLP3fJ-OYnicBUbf1a8HQUnZZznEJNIiV5

Follow me on instagram to see more content, stay updated on upcoming episodes and send me questions for future guests!
https://www.instagram.com/sarahrlazarus

Sarah Lazarus:

Hello, hello everyone. Welcome to "Wish U Were Weird". A show where I will be spilling the tea about Drag, dating politics.How Didi Pickles from the Rugrats made me who I am today. How Gordo from Lizzie McGuire deserves more. How Millie Bobby Brown caused Jeffree Star to get into that car crash and how Kandy Muse should be the winner of season 13 of "Ru Paul's Drag Race". I'm the girl who makes you think she would get along great with my cousin, Sarah Rachel Lazarus. It's just me from now on. Unfortunately, Vinny is busy walking children in nature. From a recording: "And I don't see you out there walking children in nature". But I will continue to talk shit. watch all of our favorite problematic TicTok videos and not read any books. Not a single one. So stop recommending books to me. I will not read them. I don't read. But who reads anyway, when you've got hours of trauma available to you on the news or on TicTok? I saw somebody like tweet or say I want to stop living through traumatic historical events. This just cannot be more true. Like I miss when the press used to be like Britney Spears shaved her head. Like imagine that was on the news. Like I missed that like "Free Britney", like fuck the press. However, I missed that being a major news headline. It is preposterous that people got so worked up over things like that. They would be like Tyra Banks gains five pounds and where's the bikini? No wonder like millennials and Gen Z have so many body image issues because of the shit that was in tabloids in the early 2000s. But, you know, iconic. I mean, imagine living in a time where you just actually believed that Paris Hilton spoke like that, outside of television. I miss that era. And that it was just acceptable for a Pink tracksuit to cost$150. A time before we knew that Katharine McPhee was a Republican. How absurd is that? If you don't know, this woman has been using her social media platform to appeal to a progressive audience. But she's literally even donating to Donald Trump and like republicans for years, Katharine McPhee, you cannot be my star, but you can be my fart. Back to the point of me saying how people always tell me, "You would get along great with my cousin." I really just don't get it. I really think the truth is, is that I just remind everyone of their favorite sitcom character. I just have like one of those approachable faces, which I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. The only difference between me and a sitcom character is that I'm not getting any checks. Give me your money. I just feel like I'm at a point in my life where I just don't deserve to not have money. I walked into a dog store the other day and I'm so against shopping for dogs. "Adopt, don't shop". But you know, it is therapeutic sometimes to go into one of those pet shops and just play with puppies for like an hour. And so I did that and I played with this dog and I was like so tempted. It was this adorable little dachshund and me and her were just the best of friends for about 20 minutes. And I was just curious. I was like, Okay, how much is this dog? Like, how much would it cost? I want to know what the worker said. $3,000 for a fucking dog. That dog is worth more than me like does this dog fucking shit diamonds? When I was a kid growing up in Florida, I adopted dogs from the Humane Society, which is the pound. And they would just say, you can have this dog tomorrow. Just give us $35, a half a promise and a piece of buffalo chicken. We'll wash her up and get her out tomorrow. Now they're like you need a 401k and you must suck the lives out of all the children in Salem before we can even give this dog to you. Here's what I'm sick of this week. I am sick of being the victim of marketing and advertising schemes on TikTok. All these TikTokers who, you know, they make you feel like they're your friend and they're like, I have the best advice about this. I'm gonna try this out. And you know, they tell you to buy this fucking ridiculous shit and you believe them. You think they're like the reliable friend that you can go to for advice even though you know they're all being paid for the same sponsored product because they're all selling the same fucking patchy Kat Von D foundation. I feel like I've been Kat Von Deed. They all say,(in a southern accent) " Here's the best Amazon gadget that I use all the time with my sister wife. You have to buy it right now". I say sister wife because I just feel like it's always like weird republican couples that pretend they're not Republican, much like our previous, you know, girl boss Katharine McPhee, and the product will literally be like a Lady Gaga crafted organic chromatica kitty litter removal device, and I'll fuckin buy that shit. And then I'll realize, I don't have a cat. And I never will have a cat. So I guess the lesson here is that I'm just an easy target. I always talk about the most gorgeous and the most disgusting thing I saw this week. And that was a rat that was burrowed in a thrown out Louis Vuitton bag in the Lower East Side. All I have to say was that she was just serving me y2k, anti capitalist Karl Marx realness. 10 out of 10 girlfriends said, You know what? I'm not paying taxes, but I am going to be wearing this designer handbag. I will be living it literally. She's living in the bag. So go her, fuck the system. And you know what rats actually should be paying taxes. I feel like New Yorkers just treat rats like they are one of us. And I'm sick of it. Bitches, pay your fucking taxes. I know Cinderella gave you the space. But here we fucking contribute to society. All of us. It's just a really odd thing. I just will never get over the comfortable atmosphere that rats are provided in New York City. Now for our fun fact of the day. This fact is about the Queen herself, RuPaul. Obviously, I love Drag Race. I've had many guests who have been contestants on Drag Race, but I've never talked about RuPaul herself. So this week, I thought I would share a little fact about her. What you may or may not know is that RuPaul is named after a food and RuPaul is indeed her given birth name. This food you may ask is a key ingredient in gumbo. The Ru in RuPaul comes from the word Ru which is spelled r o u x. I think i'm pronouncing that right but I could not be. Roux is a cooked mix of flour and fat that forms for the base of stews and soups. I really wish that the origin of my name was from a food just because I love food. But unfortunately, it's just royalty. Yes, my name is Sarah does come from the Hebrew definition, which is Princess from princess Sarah. So I'm just you know, fucking royalty. I guess, though I just feel like in Judaism, there'll be like a guy named Phil. And then they'll be like, your Hebrew name is King David. If you are in the Hamilton Heights area of Manhattan, I highly recommend "Camilla's Tasting Room". It's this really cute wine shop that opened across the street from me and I'm literally moving out, which fucking sucks, because this would have been such a great place to go to. It used to be a restaurant, but now they're doing wine tastings, I believe on Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays. And they have local beers, ciders, wines. They're also bringing in local chefs from around the city to build a community back up after COVID. It's also extremely affordable, especially if you love wine. Like this is the place to go. It's a Latinx owned business, so definitely go support and buy some wine and sit on your couch and cry like I will be doing tonight. As you all know there has been a lot going on in this country over the past couple months. On March 16 2021, a series of mass shootings occurred at three spas in the metropolitan area of Atlanta, Georgia. Eight people were killed and six of those were Asian women. Since the beginning of the COVID crisis, there has been a huge rise in hate crime against the AAPI community in this country. Obviously it's been going on before then, but it's gotten even worse during this past year. So do what you can to donate and give back to the community, volunteer time. I'm donating to the "Asian American Feminist Collective". Through public events and resources they seek to provide spaces for identity exploration, political education and community building and advocacy for the community. So please go donate. You could even go directly to the victims GoFundMe. A lot of them have Memorial funds up and stop reposting Instagram infographics. Go on Facebook and educate republican neighbors and people that you grew up with who are fucking idiots. The only reason you should be using Facebook is to educate ignorant assholes. Today, I am joined by this iconic gorgeous and hilarious Drag Queen, recording artist and comedian. She's known for winning "RuPaul Drag Race All Star Season Two". Releasing three chart topping studio albums. She co hosts the "Race Chaser" podcast with Willam and you can check out her new comedy special the "Alaska Thunder Fuck Extra Special Comedy Special" on OUTtv's USA Apple TV channel. Please welcome Alaska. (APPLAUSE HEARD)

Alaska:

Hi ya.

Sarah Lazarus:

Hi ya. Oh my gosh, a chill races down my arm hearing you say hi.

Alaska:

Hi ya.

Sarah Lazarus:

You know the gates have opened. I believe we are first healing We are the virus. So lovely to have you on this lovely zoom chat. We're both in, I guess tropical locations.

Alaska:

Yeah

Sarah Lazarus:

You got some leaves in the background. People listening won't be able to see but we're in, I'm in a giant pink house, both

Alaska:

Well you're in front of a giant pink house. I think it's, I think it's interesting you chose to podcast on the front lawn but I guess the acoustics are good, so go for it.

Sarah Lazarus:

They are, they are, the birds hear me, you know. I'm really trying to connect with nature.

Alaska:

I love it.

Sarah Lazarus:

I like to walk children in nature. Oh, I would love to know and we're gonna just take this back a little bit. So basically the beginning of your life.

Alaska:

Just a little bit.

Sarah Lazarus:

So I want to know, where were you born and what was your childhood like?

Alaska:

Oh my gosh, I was born. I was born in Frisbie Memorial Hospital in Rochester, New Hampshire. And, and then I grew up in Erie, Pennsylvania. And we lived in a trailer and it was by an amusement park and by the airport and by the railroad tracks, and, um, I don't know my childhood was good. My, my parents were lovely and, and worked really hard. And it was, it was good.

Sarah Lazarus:

Pennsylvania to me is like, it's such a weird like place because it's sort of like in the northeast, but it has like, it has a southern vibe to it to me. I like lived in a red. I like lived in and when I lived in Allentown, I went to college in Allentown for a year. So I know it's a very interesting place. And then there's also like farmlands too. Were you like in farmland area or any Amish?

Alaska:

Well, no, I mean, like the Amish vibe is very like eastern Pennsylvania.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay.

Alaska:

And you you must understand that Pennsylvania is fucking huge. I lived my whole like a, like young adult life, having never been to eastern Pennsylvania because it was it was like a different like world. We were, we were in western Pennsylvania. And I grew up in Erie which is like, which is sort of like because they say like, okay, Pennsylvania, like you said, it's like there's the cities there's Pittsburgh and Philadelphia and then the rest is like, you know, Kentucky.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah.

Alaska:

Erie kind of splits the difference, at least in my mind. But I definitely went to high school with kids who had Southern accents, and I was like, I don't I don't know how this is possible. But I love that.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah. I grew up in Florida so it's kind of a similar vibe because I provided. So okay, when did Drag first enter your life?

Alaska:

Oh my gosh, I mean, I ever since I was a child, I always liked girls clothes better because they are better. Like they're they pretty colors and textures and movement. And so it was like, it was very natural. And I was very like gravitated towards, like the clothes that weren't designated for me. So I kind of didn't you know I kind of got in trouble for that a little bit. But I mean Drag, I really started dipping my toes into it and learning what it is like in college, and I was in theater and I got cast as like, as like women roles a couple of times and any chance I could I you know I would put on a dress and then I kind of, I fell into Drag.

Sarah Lazarus:

Did you, you discovered Drag in L.A. though like as like they profession like, didn't you perform, there was like a club in L.A. or something? Is that when you first like stepped into it outside of like the world of theater?

Alaska:

Yeah, I mean, I moved to L.A. with the intention of giving up Drag and becoming serious actor.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay.

Alaska:

That didn't work out because I lacked the discipline and skills it takes to be a professional actor. So I was just doing Drag for fun. And then I ended up like getting booked as like the door Queen at FUBAR. And I was like Oh my god, I can like do this as a, I can make money doing this. This is crazy. So I just kept doing it and kept pursuing it and like, you know

Sarah Lazarus:

That's amazing. And where did the name Alaska Thunder F*ck 5000 come from?

Alaska:

Marijuana.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yes.

Alaska:

I named myself after a strain of marijuana. And I was also smoking a ton of marijuana at the time. So it really, it really made sense. And thank God for that name. I mean, it's easy to spell and it's easy to pronounce. Like I'm really grateful for that. Because sometimes, if I had just spent if I had to spend my whole life saying it's Alaska with the with a with a C i like i don't i couldn't do it.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah. Is that how your like aesthetic evolved too? Did your name influence your aesthetic as well? Or was it something performers you saw?

Alaska:

Not really, it was more like, this idea of the sort of extra terrestrial like, character just sort of like beamed itself into my mind and I and I do believe that it was like channeled to me from somewhere else. And so I don't so it I really my aesthetic has nothing to do with the State of Alaska. I love the State of Al ska. I guess it's like, Alaska s as a state is big and it's col. So I guess that

Sarah Lazarus:

You're not cold at all.

Alaska:

I'm frigid.

Sarah Lazarus:

So okay, you were on a very tiny show. It's very

indie "Ru Paul's Drag Race:

. You know, it's

Alaska:

My girlfriend watches it.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, I dabble in watching it as well. I want to know, what was the craziest thing that happened on the show that nobody knows about?

Alaska:

Oh my gosh.

Sarah Lazarus:

While you are on the show.

Alaska:

Oh, Jesus. I feel like I fuckin spilled everything that

Sarah Lazarus:

Oh, my gosh. there is to spill about it. What? Um, I guess Juliette Lewis

Alaska:

God bless Juliette Lewis. was was an interesting guest judge and she sort of wandered away from set and so like the the production people were like in golf carts. "Do you have eyes on Juliette? Like where is she? Where's Juliette Lewis?" She just went off like wandering

Sarah Lazarus:

Well, I mean, and it kind of makes sense. Like around the soundstage just like the the lot just like walking and and they couldn't find her and they were trying to track her down. at least like by her Instagram videos. She to me, I don't know if it's like a gag or if that's how she is. I don't know if you've seen any of her videos like dancing to Britney Spears or she that makes total sense with I feel like how she presents herself on social media.

Alaska:

I think it's just her. I think she's just very a free spirit and they're like stay in this room for four hours while we'd switch cameras around. She's like no I'm gonna go walk

Sarah Lazarus:

Was Ru reacting at all, or was Ru just in the in the judges spot?

Alaska:

I think if any, I think if anything goes wrong, there's an army of people making sure Ru Paul never knows about it., because you don't want to upset mother. Don't do it.

Sarah Lazarus:

I love that. That's incredible. And I want to know, what was your biggest takeaway from Drag Race? Like looking back now, what was the most important thing about that experience?

Alaska:

Oh, my God. I mean, well, you know, like, I don't I guess I mean, the biggest thing I learned from the whole process, you know, season five and All Stars was like to have a separation between real life and social media life.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah.

Alaska:

And I'm glad that that was a lesson that I was able to learn because I think that social media can be really harmful and really damaging to people's like minds and hearts. So like having a having an ability to recognize that real life is something that exists outside of that is like really important. And, and it really took me going through everything that I did with Drag Race to really like get that.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah, I mean, I feel like the fandom is really wild with Drag Race. I like look at, you know, Twitter. I mean, there's like, funny memes that I love to look at but also like the fans are like really, really a lot sometimes. There's like a lot of bullying and I'm like, this is Drag and this is reality TV. I think people forget that sometimes when they're like coming for the Queens on the show. And it's just I feel like they first addressed it on the show this year. I think they kind of like Ru addressed it in the last episode about social media. But it's like, it's super, it is super harmful. I and it's really particular to Drag Race too. I feel like there's a lot of that online.

Alaska:

Well, um, I mean, RuPaul has talked about it on the show for years. Like with everything that was happening with Jasmine Masters on you know, on Season Seven. She also addressed it then. And it's like, and, and I, I don't think it is just Drag Race.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah.

Alaska:

I think that it is um, it's a huge show and a huge, the audience is very much active online. But I think there's something about the fact that the internet and social media is, um, it's through a screen and it's just text. It's things everything is heightened. It's not "Oh, that's funny". It's"I'm dying, I'm dead". You know, so like, everything is exaggerated and

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah. heightened. So like, you would never tell someone like you're a piece of shit, go kill yourself. You would never say that to them in real life. Yeah.

Alaska:

Those people who are saying that kind of stuff online, probably show up to those Drag shows and cheer and scream and get their lives.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah.

Alaska:

Right. It's the fact that it's through a phone or a computer. That is like it just so it makes it way more permissible to say some shit you would never actually say or you or that you really even think. Um, but that also, the lesson to be learned is that it still affects the other person on the other side.

Sarah Lazarus:

Oh, completely.

Alaska:

The I mean, so I mean, it's just something to it's just something to keep in mind. So

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah.I get like one comment on YouTube and my like, entire being breaks. I can't even imagine what it's like. And like, and a major pl tform. I mean, it's just I'm su e it's so like mentally ta ing. But anyways, on to, you kn w, brighter pastures. I want to know, I want to know, what ar your thoughts on season 13? Wh do you want to win this sea

Alaska:

Oh my gosh, I love it. I mean, it's so hard because you know, I mean, I'm rooting for my L.A. girls Symone and Gottmik and and I did a song with Kandy and I've worked with Rose so much so I don't know. I guess, I guess just Kandy Muse because wouldn't that be a twist?

Sarah Lazarus:

Honestly, she should get an Emmy nomination, is really what it is.

Alaska:

And a producer credit.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah. She's incredible. I agree. Honestly, fucking Kandy Muse should take all of it. All the all the prizes. Okay. So you have a new comedy special out.

Alaska:

Yes.

Sarah Lazarus:

And what inspired you to create this special? You also filmed the live portions before COVID, right?

Alaska:

Yes. So this happened, you know, it's been 87 years. So much time has passed. The world changed so much. But yeah, I don't know. They asked me if I wanted to do it. And I was like, Sure. I'll try jokes. I'll try comedy. I don't know. Strict glamorous, I guess we'll try something new.

Sarah Lazarus:

And so but it's really cool. Because you like, aside from the live performance aspect, you obviously post filmed the other parts of the interview parts in a post COVID world. And I've never seen this done before, where you actually like dissect your own jokes and like talk about it, which I think is really interesting. No, no, like, in a good way. Like I think it's very interesting in this kind of world of comedy now where I feel like comedy is evolving. And we're learning like what works and what doesn't.

Alaska:

Yeah.

Sarah Lazarus:

And I don't know, I want to know what inspired you to do that aspect of it because I think that could be an interesting addition to the new world of comedy?

Alaska:

Well It was very much a product of the world completely changing. And it was. So it was like, we filmed the thing. And you know, whenever you film anything, it takes a very long time for it to, you know, be edited and put together. And, and by the time we got to the point where we were like looking at looking at it, I was like, you know, we were on lockdown. Like, there are protests in the streets, I was like, there was massive social change, massive global changes were happening. I was like, this doesn't even feel right to be putting out a jokey fucking comedy special right now, like, this isn't even appropriate. And so I was like, reaching out to like mentors and people, I trust them like asking, like, Is it appropriate? And then we were like, why don't we make this you know, part of it, and it and have those conversations as part of the special and then put it in, it would put it in the context of like the world post, the apocalypse. You know,

Sarah Lazarus:

I love your character that you kind of do with. It's like when you're wearing the yellow glasses, I think and you have the shorter hair and you sort of tell these kind of like puns about your real life. And then you're like, you have this sort of like resigned should I have told this joke? I think that was I just loved it. Brilliant to me. Like you solved comedy.

Alaska:

Thank you. You know, we needed to I mean, I needed to I was like, I was like, I'm not. I'm not a real comedian. I mean, comedians are out there doing comedy club after comedy club, honing their jokes, and their set for years. I was like, I don't, I can't. So I just went and I was like, I need to, I need to set it up by saying, Hi, I'm gonna tell jokes now. This isn't something I do. So lower your expectations. I'm going to put on Comedy hair, and a comedy jacket and a comedy brick wall and we're going to do comedy now. So

Sarah Lazarus:

Well, I would not have known that you're not like I mean, you're to me, you are a comedy Queen professional, so you need to own that. Comedians, stand up comedians could never do what you did either. You're just it just was so original. And chefs kiss Really?

Alaska:

Oh, thank you.

Sarah Lazarus:

So do you have any advice for aspiring Queens and performers right now?

Alaska:

Um, yes, I do. And whenever Lady Bunny is asked, do you have any advice for Queens who are just starting out, she just says "retire". Um, but no, I mean, I get, I don't know. I my advice is to like, figure out what, what your like, point of view is, and your aesthetic. And don't just do the makeup everyone else is doing in the hair that everyone else is doing in the clothes that everyone else is doing? Because then you're going to look like everybody. So figure out what what is you and like and like do that.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah, completely. Okay, now we're gonna move on. I have a little Madlib I want to play with you and it's about you, but I'm not going to tell you what it is. It's something that is though relevant to you.

Alaska:

Okay.

Sarah Lazarus:

And I'm going to ask you for some different things. And I'm going to fill it out and then I'd love for you to read the Madlib after and it will be very familiar to you.

Alaska:

Love it can't wait.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, so first, I'm gonna need this. It's a plural, a group of people.

Alaska:

Drag Race fans.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, the second is a venereal disease that Mae West definitely had.

Alaska:

Um, syphilis.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, I literally I don't even know if I know how to spell syphilis. Let me see if I see. A body part that deserves more recognition.

Alaska:

Collarbone.

Sarah Lazarus:

Collarbone. A type of white crusty dog. Do you know what those are? They're like those like, like Malteses, and like Yorkies where they're like, they have like the brown crusty eyes.

Alaska:

I have no idea. A Shitzu maybe.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Alaska:

I've never heard of that.

Sarah Lazarus:

And a direction East, West, left, right, etc.

Alaska:

To the far west.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, and now I'm gonna need a problematic celebrity.

Alaska:

Caitlyn Jenner.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay.

Alaska:

Is she problematic?

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah, yeah.

Alaska:

She's a little.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, seven okay. An adjective, one adjective to describe your Drag.

Alaska:

Stunning.

Sarah Lazarus:

Stunning. Brown cows stunning. Capitalism or communism?

Alaska:

Um, communism.

Sarah Lazarus:

The best plastic surgery to get.

Alaska:

Oh, botox.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yes, okay. Now a type of game that old people play.

Alaska:

Canasta.

Sarah Lazarus:

I don't even know what that is.

Alaska:

I don't either but I know that old people love it.

Sarah Lazarus:

What is it? Do you know at all what it is? I've never heard of that.

Alaska:

Canasta, I think it's um, I think it's like little like tokens on it on a board.

Sarah Lazarus:

Oh, okay. I don't think like old Jews play that. I I'm from Florida and I'm a Jewish Floridian and I don't know. I guess they play mahjong in Florida and okay. A way to cook an egg. Like a verb.

Alaska:

Overeasy.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, and now the last one. Someone you think would be the star intern at Ru Paul's Fracking Ranch.

Alaska:

Star intern?

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah.

Alaska:

Ross Matthews.

Sarah Lazarus:

Gotcha.

Alaska:

Cause Ross started out as the, as Ross the intern on

Sarah Lazarus:

Really?

Alaska:

On Jay Leno Yeah.

Sarah Lazarus:

Oh my gosh, amazing. This is a Madlib to read you, read you wrote you just a portion of it.

Alaska:

Oh my gosh.

Sarah Lazarus:

It doesn't make sense. I don't think it.

Alaska:

Hey, okay, okay, okay.

Sarah Lazarus:

Presented

Alaska:

Does it only go to change in the game?

Sarah Lazarus:

Yeah, yeah.

Alaska:

Okay, okay, okay.(Reading Madlib) Hey, Drag Race fans, my name's Syphilis. I got a tiny little collarbone. Who's that shitzu that's on the far west?Oh, wait, that's me. Hey, Caitlyn Jenner you're born stunning. The rest is communism. But your face just needs a Botox. If you canasta, and I'll over easy you all. Change in the game like my name is Ross Matthews. (Applause and laughter) Wow, that

Sarah Lazarus:

Brilliant.

Alaska:

I see I should I should have wrote I should have wrote that for my verse on All Stars. That's way better than my verse.

Sarah Lazarus:

Are, you know that was that was the pinnacle of Drag Race right there.

Alaska:

Hi art. Absolutely.

Sarah Lazarus:

Art, art. Okay, I have a couple more games for you. It's a little game called"Marry, fuck, kill". Know if you've ever played it before.

Alaska:

Okay.

Sarah Lazarus:

It, mine is more abstract though. These are more concepts than like actual things. Okay. Lil' Poundcake with a Lexapro prescription. Willem Defoe replacing Willam on"Race Chasers" or being stepped on by Rose, but it's hot.

Alaska:

Okay, um, I'd marry Lil' Poundcake on Lexapro. I would fuck Rose stepping on my face. Um, and I would kill Willem Dafoe replacing Willam, because no one can replace Willam.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yes, yes. Although that would be such an interesting dynamic.

Alaska:

You would have no idea. You would know nothing about Drag Race.

Sarah Lazarus:

Which like a concept you know, thinking about Okay, okay. Rolaskatox COVID vaccines? Anus Delano, or sparing needles?

Alaska:

Um, I would, oh my God, I would, I would marry I'm sparing needles. Cuz I already did before. I would, I would fuck the D adore Delano one. Huh? No, I would well, and then I would kill the Relaskatox vaccines because they've been like 2% effective and it just, it wouldn't be good.

Sarah Lazarus:

It would be like what the Johnson and Johnson is now except like glitter would come out.

Alaska:

I would get the Jinx Monsoon vaccine instead because that I know is 100% effective.

Sarah Lazarus:

Oh, yes, yes. Paying $10,000 to get the best COVID vaccine.

Alaska:

Okay.

Sarah Lazarus:

Getting paid$10,000 to get the Ruccine, ruccine. Then losing $10,000 for buying a pheromone vaccine.

Alaska:

Oh dear. I would kill the losing $10,000 because nobody wants to do that. I would marry the RuPaul vaccine and then I would fuck the, what was the first one?

Sarah Lazarus:

Getting paid$10,000 or no, no paying $10,000 to get the best COVID vaccine.

Alaska:

I thought that one.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay. Okay, now I want to know what is the best and the worst thing you've done this week

Alaska:

On the best and the worst thing I've done this week. I'm like looking at what day it is.

Sarah Lazarus:

Tuesday.

Alaska:

The best thing I did was like, I just bought a chaise lounge. And I have to go pick it up. So I'm getting a U Haul. And I'm going to pick up this, this thing and I don't know how that's gonna go because I'm doing it literally later today. So that might be either the best or the worst thing I've done all week. I don't know.

Sarah Lazarus:

I love it. I love it. The best thing I did was tip my Via driver $20 in cash, because actually, this is probably the worst thing also, because he told me Jerry Seinfeld and JLo were in his car before and I was like, you know what this is good luck, good vibes. But then I realized he's probably making it up, but I'm a victim of marketing and advertising.

Alaska:

I think it's true. I think drivers who drive around people, I think they have a code. They don't lie about that shit. I think it's true.

Sarah Lazarus:

But like a Via driver, like Via is like the lowest budget of the, if you like car services, I guess you know what? He could, he could have, you know.

Alaska:

I believe that. I believe it to the end.

Sarah Lazarus:

Yes, so before we go I just want to know is there anything to look forward to with the future of Alaska that we can see and watch?

Alaska:

Oh my gosh, I don't know. I mean, we're you know, there's always stuff that we're working on so I was just say stay tuned. You never know. You never know what's coming next.

Sarah Lazarus:

Okay, well I want to leave you with a quote I leave all my guests with this quote different quotes and it's not necessarily relevant but you know, we like it. "We're all born naked and the rest is Drag." Marjorie Taylor Greene.

Alaska:

Oh, such a poet, I never knew.

Sarah Lazarus:

Who knew that she loved Drag, you know, so much. Follow me on Instagram.@theeslaz. That is thee with two "E's" to catch up on all things "Wish U Were Weird" and even send me questions to ask future guests that I have on the show. You can watch video footage of "Wish W Were Weird" on my YouTube channel. SarahRLazarusComedy. That's Sarah with an "H" and Lazarus like the Bible, except Jewish.